In September, a news article spotlighted two new mums who shared their experiences giving birth without epidurals. Mums all over Singapore had some thoughts.
Trigger warning: this article contains mentions of birth complications.
“NO DRUGS PLEASE”
During my first pregnancy in 2019, I remember asking my OBGYN how I could go about writing out a birth plan. She simply asked something along the lines of, “What you want?” (she’s an amazing doctor with a real no-nonsense attitude, which I love) and I blurted out, “NO DRUGS.” I’ll never forget the exasperated sigh she tried to stifle as she said, “What you mean ‘no drugs’ – as in no pain relief? You sure?” Even though she didn’t, I could tell she was resisting the urge to roll her eyes and go, “Here we go, first-time mum here trying to act a hero.”
Her reaction made me second guess myself, but I still insisted on not being given any pain relief during labour.
My doctor didn’t press me further about it in the appointments that followed, so I was glad she respected my decision. When it came time to deliver though, the situation changed. I laboured for a total of 10.5 hours, but every two hours I got asked by the nurses, “Still don’t want epidural? Sure ah?” I don’t know how, but I stood firm on my decision for a delivery without pain relief despite battling excruciating pain that would begin from my lower back all the way down to my heels for the next six hours. However, I was given pitocin to help speed up the labour (I was dilating only at 4cm for hours with no progress) and laughing gas which kind of helped… I think. So, not quite the ‘drug-free’ labour I envisioned for myself.
Why are some women against epidurals? Benefits, and myths debunked
Epidurals are one of the most reliable and effective ways to relieve labour pain, and are generally considered safe. An anaesthetist injects the local anaesthetic into the backbone canal (in the lower back), after which the pain relief gradually takes over to drastically reduce the pain felt from contractions. Some minor side effects may occur, such as loss of feeling in the legs, nausea, shivering, itching, and headaches – but these are usually felt short-term.
That said, many women decide against epidurals not just due to the risks (as with all medical procedures) but also the myths associated with this method of labour pain relief. Some believe epidurals can cause long-term backaches, but studies show backaches are common after childbirth, with or without an epidural.
Another common myth? That epidurals could lead to a C-section, or end up being life threatening. On the contrary, an epidural can be life saving for instances where the mother experiences high blood pressure in pregnancy, or other conditions that could be further exacerbated without the option of pain relief.
Besides the myths, some proven benefits to unmedicated childbirth include the freedom to move around during labour in order to find a comfortable position, being able to get up with less restrictions after delivery, and the elimination of side effects associated with epidurals.
Why I didn’t want an epidural (at first)
So, why no epidural for me, you ask? I heard horror stories about epidurals not being administered correctly, and not by the fault of the medical professionals responsible for it, but really just out of pure suay-ness (misfortune). A friend of mine agreed to an epidural but could feel all the pain of contractions entirely in one leg while her other leg was completely numb throughout the labour. I had also heard cases of epidurals being injected painfully but not working the way they should, and extending the labour. So I didn’t want to risk it, and incur a potentially hefty hospital bill with a procedure that wouldn’t end up working in my favour.
And to a certain extent, honestly? I guess I just wanted to be praised for it. We can’t deny that society puts women who successfully give birth without pain relief on a pedestal, and I wanted to be one of them.
Just this past September, an article profiling two new mums who shared their experiences giving birth without pain relief was published. At a glance, it sounded like an opinion piece on how these women tested their bodies’ natural abilities to withstand labour pain, but language along the lines of “The pain was extreme, but it made the experience of giving birth feel even more gratifying,” unfortunately made it sound like childbirth in other forms aren’t as ‘rewarding’. The response? Mums all over Singapore were not. having. it.
While the article might have sought out to give a voice to mums who have opted for the ‘less popular choice’ in today’s world where modern medicine has come a long way, we can’t just believe that everyone has the same level of pain tolerance. Not to mention that for the safety of both mum and bub, sometimes going ‘drug-free’ just isn’t an option.
Bottom line is, epidural, no epidural, C-section, assisted birth… no one method of childbirth is more superior than the other, and welcoming a healthy baby while making sure the mother does so safely should be top priority. Celebrating some mothers for delivering ‘drug-free’ while passing judgement onto others who opt for pain relief just feeds into an unhealthy culture of comparison, and could be one of the reasons some mothers fall deep into postnatal depression.
As for me, I managed to deliver my firstborn safely without an epidural. But I’ll never forget those wee hours of the morning as I was jolted out of sleep at every contraction and clenched my fists every 10 minutes to get through the pain. Looking back now, I wish I didn’t let others’ negative experiences get to me, and wish I had been more well-equipped with the facts to better inform myself.
Welcoming pain relief with open arms the second time around
So I patted myself on the back for that first epidural-free birth, right? The universe had a good laugh at the delivery of my second born in 2022. A day before I went into labour, I caught Covid-19 for the first time since the pandemic. I started imagining a worst-case scenario where I’d have to give birth alone in an isolation ward, and I spiralled (blame the hormones!). The next day, my water broke and my husband called the hospital to check what the procedure would be for a patient in the labour ward who’s also Covid-positive. They assured us that partners are allowed in, but we’ll be put in an isolated delivery suite to avoid infecting other patients. Crisis averted.
After doing all the necessary checks and assessing how far along my labour had progressed, I was strongly advised by my doctors to take the epidural. Up to this point, I was adamant about going ‘drug-free’ like I did the first time, but I was already running a fever from the virus and could not risk trying to push without pain relief in case I got exhausted and caused distress to the baby.
Reluctantly, I agreed to it and was nervous while waiting and throughout the injection. Though painful (and I tried my best not to see the notorious ‘epidural needle’ for myself), the anaesthetist did a great job and it was done in under 20 minutes. I did experience some of that involuntary shivering, but it went away as soon as it came, and soon I was amazed at how I was able to hold a conversation and laugh along with my husband while the contractions tugged at me mildly. Some four hours later, I gave birth to my son in just three pushes.
Was there a difference in recovery? Honestly, I don’t think so. I remember being a little cocky about not needing my painkillers after the second week postpartum (I finished the entire course during my first pregnancy), but was quickly humbled when the body aches returned fast and furious the moment I stopped the medication. That was my bad. Two years on, I don’t have any of those long-term backaches people talked about, and have pretty much embraced my #mumbod and everything it’s achieved.
There is space for epidural-free births and childbirth with epidurals for a positive birth experience
I’m not at all discrediting the movement of ultra-‘natural’ birth methods like hypnobirthing and unmedicated water births even if they’re not as common here in Singapore – hey, more power to you mummies! We absolutely celebrate the accessibility to labour classes that advocate for sufficient labour prep – but it’s the glorification of such practices that tend to make new mums feel bad in a world that’s already so hyper critical of all our parenting decisions.
Vaginal birth or C-section? Breastfeeding or formula? Infant care, or resign from our jobs to care for baby full time? Screen-free play or some screen time? Homemade purees or store-bought snacks for convenience? The list goes on.
In closing, it’s best to get your doctor to lay out all the possible risks and benefits to getting an epidural or not. It also all depends on the health of your pregnancy and what your doctor advises. If they think you can go through it without an epidural, great. If they prefer that you take the epidural to avoid complications, great. If a C-section is the best course of action, great. Freedom of choice is a powerful thing, and knowing all your options can help you go into labour hopeful that you’ll come out with a positive birth experience.
The most important thing here is to make sure baby arrives safely, and that you’re in good hands, mummy.
Our HoneyKids mum tribe shares their experiences giving birth with and without epidurals:
“Going into labour for the first time, I didn’t know what to expect — how intense contractions could be and my pain tolerance. Taking an epidural was the best for me because I was able to get a few hours of nap/rest and reserve my energy for the push which took about 1.5 hours in total. By the end of it, I was so exhausted. Being pregnant for the second time now, I know I’ll be taking epidural for sure because I cannot stand the pain.”
– Mum of one, full-time educator
“I didn’t take the epidural for my first pregnancy as I was 5cm dilated by the time I reached the hospital. As for my second labour, I was induced, and waited for two days in the hospital before I finally went into active labour. By then I just wanted to be home as I missed my firstborn so much! I didn’t plan to take the epidural this time either as I hoped the labour would progress quicker. I feel like my second childbirth experience was a bit more intense compared to my first as I was not mentally and physically prepared. I still found it bearable, so I didn’t feel the need to take epidural, and could save some extra cash on the delivery bill. To me, whether a mum decides to take the epidural or not really depends on their body. It’s your choice and preference. I personally believe that doing some pre-labour exercises would really be able to help prepare your body for a faster and smoother labour, along with eating right in the weeks leading up to your due date and right before the labour to give you energy. I did this for my firstborn but didn’t get to do the same for my second.”
– Mum of two, designer and stay-at-home mum
