We're celebrating Father's Day and the journey to becoming a parent with this uplifting story of hope, love, and sacrifice..
When Marcus Moo first met Mabel, a small, scrawny four-year-old girl living in a residential care home, he never imagined she would change the course of his life forever. Today, Marcus is a devoted father of two, a leader in The Salvation Army, and an advocate for adoption and trauma-informed care. In this Father’s Day feature, Marcus opens up about the journey from befriender to adoptive father, the challenges of parenthood, and how love, intentionality, and faith shaped the bond within his family.
1. Looking back, how would you describe the moment you first met Mabel? Did you have any sense then of how deeply she’d change your life?
“It’s hard to pinpoint the exact moment. It was at a residential care setting, and I remember her as being small and sickly. At that time, I had no premonition that she would deeply change my life. But looking back, I can see how that meeting was a turning point.”
2. You went from “befriender” to adoptive father. How did you and your wife navigate the decision to adopt, especially in the face of job uncertainty and being away from family support?
“There was a quiet mutual understanding that adopting Mabel would be the right direction. That feeling was solidified in court, when we were both there with Matthew and Mabel, standing before the judge to seek approval to have legal guardianship of Mabel. The judge remarked how beautiful it was that we stood as one family and that we should consider adoption. That one statement gave the impetus and reinforced my wife’s and my convictions to take the bond all the way to adoption, to make Mabel a permanent part of our family.”
3. How did becoming a father unexpectedly reshape your understanding of what it means to be a parent?
“Initially, it was about logistics. Preparing the milk, have we got enough diapers, the sleep deprivation. But through reflection and experience, I realised parenting is about laying down values, leading by example, and carrying the weight of responsibility. It’s a journey of growing alongside your child.”
4. Was your son born before or after you met Mabel? How did you foster connection, understanding, and a sense of unity within your family, and between Mabel and her brother as siblings?
“Mabel met her brother when she was 8 and he was 2. The sibling bond wasn’t natural at first, and their connection was generally absent. I shared with Mabel the concept of family hierarchy, and the role and responsibilities of being an older sister. There is father, mother and she is the older sister as well as her younger brother. I was intentional and explicit in communicating her status as older sister. I wanted her to learn the responsibilities, privileges, and at times sacrifice. It was challenging back then as she never had to deal with the prospect of having a younger brother throughout her early childhood.”
“While her younger brother grew up seeking the attention and affection of his older sister, teenage Mabel’s preference was to lead her own life and protect her own space. There came a point, when my son was around 10 years old, that I had to call for a family conference. I informed both the children that my wife and I had decided that the size and value of their respective Christmas present for that year would be a function of how bonded both of them would be. That social experiment took off like a wildfire! Little did I expect how effective such an experiment would be. I kept my word that year and took the family to a cruise vacation (Mabel’s Christmas wish) and brought them to Hong Kong Disneyland.””
5. Were there moments you doubted yourself as a father or felt unprepared? How did you work through those doubts?
“As my wife was a homemaker, and the fact that I started parenthood young while I was still early in my career, meant that my financial muscles were not that strong. There were days when I even dreaded taking the family out for a meal. I could not figure out how it was possible that some of my friends could afford family overseas trips annually. I recalled being absolutely crestfallen on a particular Father’s Day recounting the size of my bank account that I chose to stay in at home while my wife and children went to church service that Sunday.”
“Mabel came home buying me a little toy model airplane at a neighbourhood shop as a fathers’ day gift – knowing that I had a minor fascination with turboprop planes. That brought me much encouragement! When you are down, the only way is up! More importantly, my personal Christian faith had been the anchor in weathering through the many difficult and challenging seasons in life.”
6. Can you share a particularly challenging parenting moment — and what it taught you?
“I remembered when my son was in Primary One, he was made the Math Class monitor. I used to be so thrilled about this fact – that he was given some kind of responsibility and position in class. On the eve of the first semester week school break, he was tasked to distribute a set of homework to his classmates that was to be due post holidays. For some reason, it slipped his mind to distribute those worksheets. We were home and he was sombre when he shared with me his mistake. He told me that he would like me to communicate to his math teacher that his classmates ought not to be punished for this unfortunate outcome and that he alone should bear responsibility.”
“He also asked that he step down as the Math Class monitor. I felt truly hurt at that moment because my son felt hurt for his mistake. It dawned on me then that here was a young child who understood what it meant to be responsible for one’s action and that he was willing to face the consequences. It taught me that the first step towards maturity was taking responsibility of one’s action or decision. I remembered taking the time to console him that even adults who were many years older than him could not do what he had opted to do.”
7. Now that both your children are thriving in such different spaces, what does “success” mean to you as a parent?
“To me, parenting is stewardship, not ownership. My role is to guide them to discover their purpose, character, and passions. Success is when they use their gifts to serve others meaningfully.”
8. Has working with The Salvation Army influenced your parenting? Or has being a parent changed the way you serve others in your role?
“I had no qualms about my wife becoming a homemaker largely due to her service within The Salvation Army and her exposure to caring for vulnerable children. The last 9 years of service with The Salvation Army had also led to my deeper learning into areas relating to adverse childhood experiences and trauma, and these had shaped my understanding of myself as a son as well as my understanding of myself as a father. Being a parent myself has also granted me empathy in the way I serve others in my role.”
“When I was head of a children’s home, I recalled a moment where I gathered a group of fathers whose children were residents of the home. I told the group, ‘In business, failure is part of success. But in family, the stakes are different. None of us want our families to fail.’ That conviction shaped how I parent.”
9. What would you say to someone who’s afraid to step into foster care or adoption, especially when life feels uncertain?
“Feelings aside, life is of course uncertain. That is what it is. However, fear should not be the compass in guiding one’s informed decision as to whether to foster or to adopt. Know that one will never be prepared in being a dad. You will grow into that role each moment at a time. In my own experience with being a befriender first, this made me feel more confident in my journey. First as befrienders, then as legal guardians, foster parents, and finally, as adoptive parents. The Salvation Army’s Befrienders for Families (BFF) programme, work closely with families, providing mentorship, emotional encouragement, and assistance with practical challenges.”
10. What do you hope your children carry with them from the way you raised them?
“I am very assured and am happy for them that they have the discernment to say no when they ought to and that they also know when to embrace and dive into a given opportunity that presents itself. I hope that they carry forward that ability to distinguish value over price and meaning over superficiality in the years ahead. 11. If you could leave just one message to other dads (or would-be dads), what would it be?”
“To the other dads, let’s remember that being a father means that we are a son first. And whatever father’s issues we have will have a bearing on our relationship with our children. It is absolutely ok to reach out to other fellow dads for mentorship or for advice. And believe it or not, many of the problems we face, many dads are stuck out there having to deal with them in their own mental silos.”
Final Thoughts
Marcus Moo’s journey is a powerful testament to the strength of chosen family, the quiet heroism of everyday fatherhood, and the transformational power of love and service. His story reminds us that parenting isn’t about perfection—it’s about presence, purpose, and perseverance.
About Marcus:
Marcus Moo is a father of two, a senior leader in The Salvation Army, and an advocate for trauma-informed care and family support. His work has influenced national conversations around child welfare and parental empowerment.
Thank you to Marcus for sharing his family story and for all the wonderful work he does with the Salvation Army. Happy Father’s Day!
