Don't underestimate the power of working on yourself before becoming a parent – one doula shares how and why it's so important to identify your triggers
The decision to become a parent is one of life’s most significant milestones, filled with excitement, love, and perhaps fear. As you prepare to embark on this transformative journey, there’s another adventure that deserves attention – the exploration of your inner self.
By delving into your emotional landscape and recognising your triggers before embracing parenthood, it can have a profound impact on your parenting experience and your ability to nurture and support your child effectively. It becomes a game-changer, breaking the cycle of intergenerational trauma. So, as you prepare to take on this beautiful role, here are some important aspects to ponder upon:
Self-awareness leads to empowerment
Inner exploration is the key to self-awareness – understanding your emotions, thoughts and behaviours. By identifying your triggers, you gain insight into patterns that may impact your parenting style. Embracing self-awareness empowers you to respond thoughtfully rather than react impulsively in challenging situations. Start by exploring what your triggers are, the reasons you get triggered, how your body responds to these triggers and what can help you increase your window of tolerance to them.
Navigating emotional baggage
We all carry emotional baggage from our past experiences. Exploring your emotions and addressing unresolved issues can prevent projecting past pain onto your child. Inner child bonding is a great exercise for people who experience childhood trauma. By healing and finding emotional balance, you can resolve your parenting triggers and create a healthier environment for your future family. Here are some meditation resources!
Creating tools for self-regulation
Self-regulation empowers you to manage stress, navigate challenges, and respond to parenting situations with calmness and clarity. Get curious and ask yourself, “how does my body feel when I am triggered” and put together some tools that can help you regulate your nervous system. Engage in mindfulness practices, such as meditation, deep breathing exercises, embodied movements or simple things like exercise and doing more of what you love!
Nurturing your relationship
How can you and your partner foster effective communication and synergy? What are ways that you can resolve conflict in a respectful and constructive manner? Think about how you would each like to be supported, especially in challenging situations. Here is a great resource from the Gottman Institute.
The journey of inner exploration is a gift you give not only to yourself but also to your future child. By understanding your parenting triggers and nurturing your emotional well-being, you lay the foundation for a more mindful and compassionate parenting experience. At the same time, empowering you to break free from past patterns.