Wondering if you should make your maternity leave a permanent thing? Maybe this will help you decide...
It doesn’t matter if you’re a stay-at-home mum, a working mum, or a mum who works from home – ALL mums work. Raising a little person to become a decent grown-up takes a lot of responsibility. From feeding, bathing and clothing them to ensuring all their emotional needs are met, it’s enough to make anyone age faster than the brie in our fridge. But, for the most part, we love it and wouldn’t trade anything – even a date with Chris Hemsworth – for it. But here’s the hard part: what happens when you need to make a choice between staying at home with the kids or heading back to work?
It’s a tough choice
Making the decision to go back to work or staying at home isn’t as straightforward as it may seem. There are many pros and cons to either choice. While staying at home can be rewarding, being able to put your wrap dress on and head to work can provide personal satisfaction, and for some mums, give them the break they need to stay sane. There’s also the money issue – for some mums, saying goodbye to work isn’t even an option. But, provided that you have options (and money isn’t your deciding factor), here’s some advice from real mums to help you make that all-important final decision…
Why these mums love being working mums
“What I love about being a working mum is the financial ability to provide most of what I want for my child. Being a daughter of a mum who worked, I wish to instil the same kind of independence and, to a certain extent, responsibility for oneself, in my daughter.” – Serena
“For my daughters to be able to see they can have different roles and many choices.” – Corrina
“I have time to develop myself professionally.” – Myra
“I love that I’m able to set a good example on good work ethic to my kids.” – Alyssa
“Having a career helps me preserve my sense of self outside the home.” – Therese
The downside to being a working mum
“The never-ending guilt trips and missing out on all the milestones.” – Jana
“Constantly questioning yourself if the money is worth it.” – Marie
“I feel like it’s affected my relationship with my husband. I can’t remember the last time we went on a date.” – Ashley
“My house is a constant mess. There aren’t enough hours in my day to stay on top of my chores!” – Grace
“I feel like I don’t have enough time with my kids – I only get to see them for an hour each day.” – Amy
Here’s why these SAHM mums didn’t mind leaving the workforce
“I love that I get to take care of my kids and spend more time with them. I’m able to witness every milestone firsthand.” – Laarni
“It’s great never having to have the guilt of calling in sick or trying to scrounge care for when one of my kids is sick.” – Alyssa
“I get to choose how I want my child to be brought up, especially when it comes to how they eat, play and sleep.” – Brenda
“It might sound unhealthy, but I love the fact my child chooses me over anyone else!” – Brenda
“I’m a very independent person and I didn’t think that should stop when it came to raising my kids. Nobody else can raise my kids the way I do.” – Laarni
The downside to being a stay-at-home mum
“I feel like the chores just don’t ever end. There are no breaks when you are at home!” – Laarni
“My child is super clingy – I think it’s because he relies on me for everything and it’s always been that way. I’m dreading the day he starts going to preschool because I think it will be a nightmare for everyone involved.” – Becky
“People think being a stay-at-home mum is easy, especially those with help. The washing of dishes, planning of meals and laundry are taken care by someone else such as grandmothers or helpers, while the mother can focus on playing and caring and being emotionally available for the child. However, to be emotionally available for more than three or four hours can be quite tiring, too.” – Brenda
“It kind of feels like you are going crazy because there’s no other adult to talk to.” – Laarni
At the end of the day, all we want to do is give our kids the best. But it’s also OK to do what you think is best for YOU. Making the decision to go back to work doesn’t mean you’re choosing a career over your children and deciding to forgo your career doesn’t make you a sell-out. Before you make your final decision, think about what will work best for your family and what will make everyone, especially you, happy.
