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What if the hardest part of disciplining your child is you?
Parent educator Kim DeMarchi has spent more than 30 years working with families, training thousands of parents around the world in positive discipline. Her first question has nothing to do with tantrums, consequences or bedtime. She asks, “who do you want walking through your door when your child is 25?”
Like all parents of young children, we want to know what to do when your child refuses to listen, throws the toy and finds every button you have. Kim answers with a live role play that goes wrong in a very familiar way, a four-step formula she once stuck on Post-it notes around her house, and a story about a bedtime threat she regretted.
Why does “good job” get a raised eyebrow? Why does a consequence need to make sense? And why might letting your child fail be one of the most loving things you do?
Can you raise kids without shouting, shaming or going fully permissive? Press play.
What you’ll take away
- The question Kim asks every parent before she talks about discipline at all
- Why your child sometimes needs to borrow something from you, and what happens when you have none to lend
- What your own irritation is trying to tell you about your child
- The one small word that quietly cancels out your empathy
- Why “good job” might be the most expensive two words you say
- The three questions Kim asks before handing out any consequence
- Why letting your child fail might be one of the kindest things you do
About the guest
Kim DeMarchi is a certified parent educator and family coach with over 30 years of experience in education. She has trained thousands of families across 30 countries, produced close to 100 parenting podcasts and appeared regularly on US television. She has flown to Singapore for 17 years to teach positive discipline workshops that consistently sell out.
Growing Pains is HoneyKids Asia’s podcast for the conversations you want to have after the kids go to bed.
If this one moved you, share it with a parent who needs to hear it. Or send your feedback and topic suggestions to podcast@honeykidsasia.com — we’d love to hear what you’d like us to talk about next.
Growing Pains is produced in partnership with Poddster, Singapore’s podcast studio.
